His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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