He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
