Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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