East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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