i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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