I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
