I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
