He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Randomize
