Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
