it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Can I color on your dick again?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
