stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
