somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
