see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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