You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
