Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
