I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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