Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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