we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
