Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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