we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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