Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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