Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Randomize
