I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
