I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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