i jhust puked up my retainher.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Randomize