I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I wear drunk well.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
