Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
