please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
