Dual....:-)
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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