i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Hello my rib-scented angel!
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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