I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
