There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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