I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
