your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
