They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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