Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
