Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
