im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
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