WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
