I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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