Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
We don't watch enough power rangers
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
COCAINE IS GR8
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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