Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
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