We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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