He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
no. you can't hotbox the world.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
