I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
