In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
Randomize
