Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
