I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
