I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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