There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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